Then Taken From a 1950s Home EC Textbook: 1. Get your work done. Plan your tasks with an eye on the clock. Finish or interrupt them an hour before he is expected. Your anguished cry, “Are you home already?” is not exactly a warm welcome.

2. Have dinner ready. Plan ahead, even the night before, to have a delicious meal – ON TIME. This is a way of letting him know that you have been thinking about him and are concerned about his needs. Most men are hungry when they come home and the prospects of a good meal are part of the warm welcome needed. 3. Prepare yourself. Take 15 minutes to rest so you will be refreshed when he arrives. Touch up your make-up, put aribbon in your hair. He has just been with a lot of weary-looking people. Be a little gay and a little more interesting.

4. Prepare yourself. Take 15 minutes to wash thechildren’s hands and faces (if they are small), comb their hair and if necessary, change their clothes. They are little treasures and he would like to see them playing the part.

5. Don’t greet him with problems or complaints. Don’t complain if he’s late for dinner. Count this as minor compared with what he might have gone through that day.

6. Make him comfortable. Have him lean back into a nice chair or suggest he lie down in the bedroom. Have a cool or warm drink ready for him. Arrange his pillow and offer to massage his neck and shoulders and take off his shoes. Speak in a soft, soothing, pleasant voice.

7. Listen to him. You may have a dozen things to tell him, but the moment of his arrival is not the time. Let him talk first.

8. Make the evening his. Do not complain if he doesn’t take you out to dinner or to other places of entertainment. Instead, try to understand his world of strain and pressure, his need to be home and relax.

9. The goal: Try to make your home a place of peace and order where your husband can renew himself in body and spirit.

Now The Rules 1. The FEMALE always makes the rules.

2. The rules are subject to change at any time without prior notification.

3. No male can possibly know all the rules.

4. If the FEMALE suspects the male knows all therules, she must immediately change some or all of the rules. 5. The FEMALE is never wrong! If the FEMALE is wrong, it is due to a misunderstanding which was a direct result of something the male did or said wrong. 7. The male must apologize immediately for causing said misunderstanding. 8. The FEMALE may change her mind at any time.

9. The male must never change his mind without the express written consent of the FEMALE.

10. The FEMALE has every right to be angry or upset at any time.

11. The male must remain calm at all times, unless the FEMALE wants him to be angry and/or upset.

12. The FEMALE must, under no circumstances, let the male know whether or not she wants him to be angry and/or upset.

13. The male is expected to mind-read at all times.

14. The male who doesn’t abide by the rules can’t take the heat lacks backbone and is a wimp.

15. Any attempt to document the rules could result in bodily harm.

16. If the FEMALE has PMS, all the rules are null and void.

17. The FEMALE is ready when she is ready.

18. The male must be ready at all times.